But no announcement was made and the elders (where my dad is an elder) are pursuing ways to DF me. That is why I want to DA myself to close this chapter on my life and keep my power - It comes down to F them. Seriously. I need to just move on. The JW family members that shun me are dead to me. If they chose to change their minds I will welcome them but I am not expecting any changes.
White Waves
JoinedPosts by White Waves
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30
I've had it. I want to DA myself
by White Waves inbut i am afraid to send a letter to my old kh.
what should i write to make sure they don't just df me?
also, they refused my request to da myself before.
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What do you think about a JW Recovery Program...
by White Waves ini have moved too much in the last 2 years - 6 times.
doctors are far and few between where i live and a nurse practictioner the norm.
the doctor i found is wonderful.
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White Waves
When I wrote this topic, I was thinking of the people without internet abilities or access. I agree, this site is awesome. But if someone couldn't have this site, what would help them get out and move on? If there isn't a reason, I don't intend to contact this woman. I am happy with the resources I have been blessed with.
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Statistics on the Effect of Katrina on Jehovah's Witnesses
by Kenneson ini came across this interesting site today, which gives info on the number of homes and kingdom halls damaged by hurricane katrina in both mississippi and louisiana.
it's a bunch.
thought i would share it with you.. http://mywebtimes.com/ottnews/archives/ottawa/sections.cgi?prcss=display&id=259984 .
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White Waves
PUKE!!! This is another "JWs love and help each other and everyone with no evidence or sincerity" article. Granted, this is many many states away from me but no body asked up here in WISCONSIN for any financial aid. Yet, in any situation like this, JWs are discouraged from contributing to non-JW orgs, whether that be time or $$$$. I bet Dr. Jekyll is right on the $$ again. And what took the JWs sooooo long to help their own??? I am sure their JWs have many neighbors that would LOVE some assistance.
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Anyone ever just picked up and moved far away
by Cabin in the woods inhas anyone here ever just gotten so sick of it all that they just packed up their belongings and pets and left?.
did you know people in the place that you went to?
how did you find work?.
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White Waves
ballistic, why move? sounds like you've got it made under the sun. women, sea shore (oh, so romantic), women here one day, gone another... Why move? I am a bit jealous. I have always said you men have it made. WW
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What do you think about a JW Recovery Program...
by White Waves ini have moved too much in the last 2 years - 6 times.
doctors are far and few between where i live and a nurse practictioner the norm.
the doctor i found is wonderful.
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White Waves
I have moved too much in the last 2 years - 6 times. Doctors are far and few between where I live and a nurse practictioner the norm. The doctor I found is wonderful. She actually understands what ex-JWs go through. I was skeptical - a bit scared. Then, she said it was a controlling cult! She gave me the name and number of a woman that is developing a JW Recovery Program that therapists, phsychologists can use to best help people like this. With my disabilities brought on by my abusive JW husband, I need a wonderful dr like her for many reasons. She said I can call this woman if I wish but that if I don't that is up to me. What do you think would be the most beneficial to ex-jws like us, ex cult members, that would help the therapists, phsychologists better help ones like us move on, heal and embrace life like we all are trying to do? I haven't contacted her yet, but I will. I just want to go with more than my own opinion. From personal experience, few understand the power of a cult, few comprehend the lemming complex of the WBTS. Thank you in advance for your input and insight. I hope she will be successful in helping others like us and bringing to light the true ways of the WBTS. WW
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35
Anyone ever just picked up and moved far away
by Cabin in the woods inhas anyone here ever just gotten so sick of it all that they just packed up their belongings and pets and left?.
did you know people in the place that you went to?
how did you find work?.
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White Waves
I did. I had to. I first moved 1 hr from my old KH. But, it was with my JW mother-in-law and non-jw father-in-law. There were a few clashes there as I firmly refused any JW talk, etc. I was recovering from a life-threatening injury from my oh so honorable JW husband. I could not divorce my husband while I lived there.
A year later I moved another hour away and became free and (after more recovery) 9 months later, filed for divorce. It is not as hard to do as it may seem. I moved from the city - Milwaukee - to a rural area and everyone here is so down to earth, warm and friendly. I have always loved nature but felt obligated to pursue JW interests-not my own. Here I am free to persue my love of nature and people who are real. Jobs pay less but the cost of everything is less too. It is perspective, really. The sincerity and reliability of these people is strengthening. The natives to this area have no idea how rare their ways are to a city person. They follow the path of my Grandfather knew, as he said "you must be true only to yourself - no one else." I love my new life. I am happy I was brave enough to make the move and that my JW family chose shunned me - not providing shelter or support for me because of fear for their own JW well-being. They forced my escape.My JW family's actions preached to my soon-to-be-ex-husbands family what the JWs are all about and now preach loud and clear to my boyfried and his family too. I have had non-JW family members visit where I live and they all say to me and to others they have never seen me happier, more peaceful or more comfortable in my own skin than now. They know I am where I belong. Yes, I struggle with the physical issues my mate left me with, but they see me as being so strong now. I personally hope my life goes a long way in preventing any more JW converts. I hate my soon-to-be-ex-husband and the JWs that enabled my years of abuse in the name of not shaming the JW org or taking away the authority of the husband in marriage, but being just brave enough to break free is very empowering. The last time he was arrested I became aware of so many orgs that help people like me and I took advantage of a few. I made many mistakes, like not prosecuting my husband fully. But I did seek therapy (offered free from the court system and paid through former employer) to heal. I have found a phychologist and a primary doctor that knows about JW and the cult it is and specialize in the abuse this org inflicts on its followers. These people empower me, teach me, and lead the way to my finally being free, some day.
I encourage all in this situation to move far away. It really speeds up the fading, if that is what you want. You can immediately be JW free!!! You are hard to track too, if you set up a PO box, not a home address. Or, do as I did (unknowingly) and move to an area without a JW KH!!. Just check your prospective areas online or apply for jobs outside your home area and before accepting, verify that the cost of living is in balance with your new income level. My Social Security pay is in line with my current cost of living needs. Homes where I live now are 1/4 of the price they would be where I lived before. That makes a huge difference. Property taxes too, are so small in comparison. Be brave in the move and then you avoid the long term fade process. In rural areas, everyone is a talker. Whether you are at a store or taking a walk. Regardless, reach out in the community however you can and you will find a welcoming world of much less judgemental people who don't care what you came from only where. Good luck to all that take that road.
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30
I've had it. I want to DA myself
by White Waves inbut i am afraid to send a letter to my old kh.
what should i write to make sure they don't just df me?
also, they refused my request to da myself before.
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White Waves
Thank you, everyone for your posts. I was angry when I posted the topic and your responses helped me see the WBTS only has the power I give them. Also, DF, DA, all the same, really. I guess for now I will sort his out and live my life. NOW I HAVE A LIFE. I do think I will still DA myself, but not until I speak with my phychiatrist (yes, I need one) in 2 weeks. I will send the letter to all of the elders (including my father) and I will send it to my last congregation too, so I won't be denied DAing a second time. Thanks again. This site has saved me, healed me and help me move on so much. I really don't know where I would be without it. Love - WW
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What nice, interesting thing did you see today?
by Lady Lee inso often we are stuck in the negative part of life and see so much of the bad.
the news is full of it.
i look for the things that are nice.
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White Waves
I went on our deck to call in the dogs and saw this beautiful bird - rare in our area and likely just migrating through - a scarlet tanager. He stayed in our yard for over ten minutes, eating from our bird seed and calmly watching me. Until I identified him, I thought it could be an escaped pet bird, he was so calm. Really, everyday, if I am open to it, I see something that makes me happy or find a way to bring joy in my life - guilt-free since the borg no longer controls me!!
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I`m perplexed; What legislates for the gross lack of love?
by jambon1 ini`ve been out of the org for a while now and im perplexed about why there is such a lack of genuine live in the cong`s.
when you think about it, they are taught to exemplify jc, they are taught to exemplify the 'god of love'.
the brothers are constantly encouraged at ms & elder meetings to deal with the brothers 'lovingly'.
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White Waves
Dr Jekyll hit the nail on the head:
I think it all fell apart down the hall when we were told by the co to stop associating outside the hall as a congregation. by that I mean there were no longer congregation zoo trip or days out, in-fact groups of 4 or more were frowned upon.
My congregation took the counsel to heart and became very frosty. A few years later a different Co got up on the platform and told us all off for not being very friendly as a congregation!
This is exactly what happened to my hall years ago - no get-togethers with the exception of showers and funerals - blah!!!! We became known as the clicky cold congregation of the south side (of Milwaukee). The back stabbing and paranoia of everyone really got out of had the less everyone associated together. I missed the picnics with baseball, volley ball and grilling. And the community center gatherings in winter with basketball, pool, bowling, and of course FOOD with a convenient bar on site . The more rules enacted the less joy will be in that org. The more fear and depression
WW
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18
I`m perplexed; What legislates for the gross lack of love?
by jambon1 ini`ve been out of the org for a while now and im perplexed about why there is such a lack of genuine live in the cong`s.
when you think about it, they are taught to exemplify jc, they are taught to exemplify the 'god of love'.
the brothers are constantly encouraged at ms & elder meetings to deal with the brothers 'lovingly'.
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White Waves
The conditionality of every action and the fear of anothers' action reflecting on you so you would rather avoid a friend than risk your own neck, even in the smallest of situations. Even in the case of a percieved failing or error. LOVE in this org is really just a control tool.
